God has told me that he is working on everything in my heart. God has told me that he will not let him hurt me. God has told me that he is not angry with me and that he loves me. These are all of the things God told me before my psychic attacker invaded my energy and cut off my communication with my spirit guides and with God. I am sure that they are all still here and trying to communicate with me, but it is exhausting to try to discern them from the attacker. God also told me to pray everyday and every night. I am sure that he hears all of my prayers. Mostly I say prayers of thanks and I try really hard to say them from my heart. I usually name every little thing I am thankful for because I know it can be much much worse.
I read a book called the 99 names of Allah that I purchased from the Bawa Muhaiyadeen Fellowship. In this book are 99 names with 99 different qualities attached to them. I found two names that resonate with me and I recite them over and over along with prayers of thanks from my heart throughout the day. The first name is Ya Muqsit (yay muksit I believe is how you pronounce it, but it is most important to pronounce it from your heart). Ya Muqsit means The Just, the Equitable: "God dispenses divine justice to his created beings and protects them with meticulous precision". The second name is Ya Muntaqim (yay muntakim I believe). Ya Muntaqim means The Avenger: "God inflicts punishment on those who injure the qalb of spotless effulgence within his His created beings". The other names have explanations and disseminate God's glory and limitless patience and forgiveness. I recite these names for comfort that I am not suffering in vain and that my suffering does not go unnoticed. I have been told by energy healers to just ignore the invasive thoughts of my attacker and the torrent of insults that I receive from his obviously separate consciousness. I am fortunate to be working with an energy healer now with her own spirit guides that is able to discern my predicament and offer me guidance in my prayers and actions. So I have support. I recite the two names with other affirmations of God and Light daily. These two names renew my faith in God everyday when the invasive energy tries to manipulate my thoughts.
I recently was able to leave a hospitalization due to my stress over this situation. I am not afraid to write about this because I know that I am not the only person who has suffered such a debilitating affect. In everything I have read thus far, I have not read of anyone one thing being able to eliminate my problem except God. I really wish there was a monastary for people suffering this plight to simply go pray and meditate all day long together while we offer each other moral support. At least we wouldn't be calling each other's experience hallucinations. What I really found most upsetting was the lack of recognition of a difference between hearing spirit guides and hearing voices. The sensation isn't even really same. For one, you are able to converse with a separate consciousness from your own. It doesn't have the debilitating physical and delusional attributes of schizophrenia and most spirit guides will leave you alone if you ask God to tell them to. God gives the spirits permission to do what they do, so there is a whole hierarchy involved. After God has given them their assignments with you, they are usually more receptive to your needs and will leave you alone at will. I attribute this to the fact that in my experience, some spirits were newly deceased and had not yet spoken to God for their assignments. Once they were in God's grace and I was praying daily, it was much easier to get back to my normal life. From what I am reading and learning from this seems to be the way of a spiritual awakening that is happening all over the world. I watched a youtube video by magentapixie called Calling the Gatekeeper - protecting your psychic space, which described essentially what happened to me for a week during the recent blizzard.
